Well, July is over and I’m glad to see the back of it.
July had it’s up and downs. It just happened to be that the downs were a lot harder to contend with than I would like to admit to.
I’ve found myself struggling with the desire to want to write, I’ve been obsessed with views, likes and all that jazz, I also received a bit of a confidence knock when it comes to my writing. I won’t rehash that story fully, but it has honestly had me wondering if writing is for me anymore. I scrapped a post I had planned for yesterday and I’ve been finding it hard to get inspired.
I’ve been tired, paranoid, sore and dealing with the things depression throws at you. I’ve been thinking to myself”why am I so obsessed with views/likes”, “if this person feels this way about my content, I bet others do”, “are people getting bored of my constant mental health posts”, these posts get over whelming.
On the gaming/geek aspect of my blog I’ve hit a roadblock. My PlayStation crashed recently and has been acting up since then. The internal hard drive has had it, technical wording, I know. 😂
It’s a simple fix, I just need a new internal hard drive, but I lost the screenshots and all my saves for objects I was working on. Hindsight is 2020 and I’ll back my files up in the future. A few saves have been stored in the cloud saves, but I can’t recover all of them.
First world issues, I know. It can just be frustrating when technology falls apart at the worst possible time. So far, in 2020, I’ve had a tablet stop working, my kindle stop working, my laptop is also due a repair, or a replacement. It just adds up.
These things coupled with any mental illnesses can be so overwhelming, the current world climate doesn’t help much either, it just doesn’t feel right going out and seeking repairs for these items when they aren’t necessarily essential.
This will all be sorted, they always end that way in the end. I just need some time to work through personal matters. Of course, my PlayStation not working has delayed a fair bit of gaming content I had planned, so I’ll need to redo those and finish up what I have from other platforms. So, if I miss a day, or forget to post about something/forget to blog, just know it’s not intentional, I’m just sorting things out.
Thank you for sticking with me. ❤️
Thank you for your time, I appreciate you being here.
If you have any spare change lying about and can support the blog, here is my Ko-Fi page. This is obviously optional, I’m just grateful to have you here.